Guy Friend Tips from 7 Buddy Movies
How do you I find new friends at my age? I watched some old movies and got some ideas to share.
I Love You, Man
In this modern buddy movie about a guy with no male friends, L.A. real estate agent Peter Klaven (played by Paul Rudd) is engaged yet doesn’t have anyone to be his best man. Enter Sidney Fife (Jason Segal). Sydney is a free-spirited investor who drops by Peter’s open house to enjoy the free food. Following some serious ups and downs, this mis-matched pair wind up as great friends.
I Love You, Man shows that developing friendships takes effort. This is no different for aging men.
Guy friend tip: If you’d like to up your male bonding game, think about the things you enjoy doing.
- Sports, including golf, tennis, bicycling or swimming.
- The performing arts, from joining a choral group to trying out for community theater.
- Games, from backgammon to a local chess club.
- Volunteering, at your church, or a community cause you believe in.
- At any event, instead of just showing up, doing your thing and leaving, stick around and see if there’s someone you’d enjoy talking to.
- Ask your female friends if they know someone you might enjoy hanging out with.
Need more inspiration? Let’s peak into the long tradition of Hollywood buddy movies. From Grumpy Old Men to the Road to Morocco and the more recent Last Vegas, studying the buddy movie genre reveals what it takes to get and keep male friendships.
Here are a few to consider:
Last Vegas: A Blast from the Past
In the movie Last Vegas, four mature men, pals since childhood, gather in Las Vegas to throw a bachelor party for their last remaining single friend.
Guy friend tip: Men who consider themselves close friends may lose touch and reconnect years later for a special occasion. While they may never share the intimate details of their lives, the unspoken bond can be strong. That’s just how guys roll. On the other hand, we’re not getting any younger, are we? Is there someone you can reach out to and say, “hey, buddy, how have you been?”
The Shawshank Redemption: Friendship Through Adversity
Not all buddy movies are comedies. In this inspiring film, a white banker from Maine — wrongfully accused of killing his wife — is thrown together with a black man who’s spent most of his life in prison. While their friendship would’ve been highly unlikely outside prison walls, these two men form a bond that will last a lifetime.
Guy friend tip: Think about your male friends. Is there someone who’s really been there for you through thick and thin? What can you do to honor him?
Grumpy Old Men: Frenemies for Life
Two aging men — life-long frenemies — act like they hate each other. But the truth is they love one another dearly. Perhaps it’s that male competitive streak. We all know guys who relish beating each other at tennis, bowling or golf, then wind up yukking it up and back-slapping after the game. And you know what’s even sweeter? Friendship among older men.
Guy friend tip: When’s the last time you met up with one of your old pals for a game of darts, a walk in the park, or even a cup of coffee? Time’s a wasting, so….
Road to Morocco: Serious Fun
Back in the 1930s and 1940s, Bing Crosby and Bob Hope appeared in several “road movies.” Like two real life friends, Hope and Crosby enjoyed life’s adventures and loved hanging out together.
Guy friend tip: Have you considered a road trip with one or more of your friends? If not, why not? If that seems ambitious, rent Road to Morrocco, pop some popcorn and enjoy your favorite beverage with your pal — along with a few laughs.
Abbott and Costello Meet Frankenstein: Keeping Friendship Alive
In this wacky buddy comedy, Frankenstein and Dracula arrive in America so that Dracula can find Frankenstein a new brain — courtesy of Costello. While it’s not long on plot, there is no shortage of fun as Abbott helps Costello keep his head.
Guy friend tip: Why so stoic? Plan a fun outing where you can let your hair down.
Sideways: When a Friendship Goes, Well, Sideways
Meet Miles and Jack. College roommates half a lifetime ago, they hit the road for a little wine tasting adventure before Jack gets married. Truth is, they have little in common and pretty much annoy the heck out of each other. But what they lack in morale conviction and a sense of direction they make up for in enthusiasm and hilarity.
Guy friend tip: Do you have a friendship that’s going sideways? If you think it’s worth repairing, make the first move and reach out. (Just be sure to establish some ground rules — and go easy on the Merlot, OK?)
Whether you’re looking to rekindle an old friendship or begin a new one, friendship among older men can be just as rich, vital and rewarding as those enjoyed by younger guys. It all starts by showing up. (Hint: It’s your move.)